PHASE 2!!!!!!!!

HOLLAAAA!

Ok, so we know it's been a while and we kept on saying to "get ready" for Lord knows how long, but we're *SO* excited to announce that M.A.M.is.BACK! and with a vengeance! After an incredibly successful awareness and fundraising campaign (that has received press coverage from front-page news to PEREZ HILTON), we're officially launching PHASE II of our campaign with a pair of tickets to LADY GAGA's concert in SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH! Whoever can raise the most money for charity (100% goes to the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation) wins the tickets! It's that simple!

Media Minute

We're in the news again!

Check it out HERE

Paws Up!

Little Monsters!
I wanted to update everyone on how PHASE I (more on this later!) of M.A.M. went :)

The competition for two floor tickets to Lady Gaga’s Monster Ball at Rexall Place in Edmonton on August 27, 2010 concluded two days ago.

We are pleased to announce that Kathy Chia of Edmonton is the winner. Congratulations Kathy, you’ve earned it!
We would also like to thank everyone who took part in the competition; thank you for participating and helping us raise funds and awareness for this little-known disease.

In addition, thank you to everyone for joining our campaign of awareness and hope. Now, little monsters and myelomaniacs, we are that much closer to making multiple myeloma a household name, a feat that will undoubtedly aid in the discovery of new treatments and, one day, a CURE! This would have never happened without the sheer, collective power of working together for a better future. So again, thank you!

Monsters Against Myeloma is FAR from being over (as we have some VERY exciting news to share with you all soon!), so please encourage all those you know to join our group and follow suit.

We have members here that come from all over the world! From France to Germany to Iceland to Brazil to the States to right here in Canada! Together, united as one, we are capable of achieving anything. We are capable of what, at times, seems like the impossible; we are capable of DEFEATING.CANCER.

We are still accepting donations for the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation. Please visit http://321cure.themmrf.org/site/TR?pg=fund&fr_id=1040&pxfid=9150 or the discussion board of our facebook group for more details.

PAWS UP LITTLE MONSTERS, PAWS UP!

GAGA FOR GAGA! MONSTERS AGAINST MYELOMA! WE.ARE.LIVE!!!

Ok so I just realized that I hadn't made this **VERY** important post yet!!! Tsk tsk. But as i'm sure you can tell, our fundraising effort "Monsters Against Myeloma" is officially LIVE!!! (FINALLY). If you don't know already, basically I am giving away a pair of FLOOR.LADY.GAGA tickets to her August 27 show in Edmonton, Alberta to the person/team that is able to raise the most money for the MMRF (Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation). If you would like to compete, please send us an e-mail indicating so at monstersagainstmyeloma@live.com! If you don't want to compete for these wonderful tickets, but would still like to support our campaign of hope, awareness, strength, and gaga-tude, the steps are SUPER easy!

1. Visit out site here

2. Click on the "Make a Donation" button

3. Fill out the necessary fields

4. (optional) Write your name, donation amount, and a message in our guest book!

*note*: Tax-receipts are mailed out to the address indicated in the billing information

Easy peasy right?! I can't tell you how much your support means to us. We appreciate every word, every hug, every dollar, everything. In the end, we are all working towards the same cause (a CURE!), so hopefully M.A.M. will be able to contribute towards that ambitious, but fully possible and realistic, goal. Even if we only manage to raise a penny, I will still consider M.A.M. a raging success. We started off as a small idea to raise a little money for charity, and exploded into this international, global campaign of hope and awareness. It has been through our global brothers and sisters (yes, YOU!), that we have been able to add an extra step in making Multiple Myeloma a household name. Gaga is the biggest superstar on planet Earth right now. Combining her incredibly passionate (and LARGE) fanbase with all us crazy and super duper myelomaniacs(/myelomics/myelomians), we have been able to communicate our message to the farthest corners of the planet. In our facebook group, we have people from Canada, America, Germany, France, Iceland, Italy, and more! Currently, we have about 870 members. THIS MEANS that at LEAST 870 members now know about Multiple Myeloma, a disease I had never even HEARD of pre-diagnosis. I think it is safe to say that you may now check off step 1 of Operation: WORLD DOMINATION. Great Job Little Monsters/Myelomaniacs, great job! Now let's see this to the end and END.CANCER.ONCE.AND.FOR.ALL!

The Big T

So. Today is a big day. It is the first day in a very important and long process that will **hopefully** do the trick in setting my mom into a deep and long remission, until a cure is discovered. Yesterday I went to bed with a mix of emotions... This day has been a long time coming. And you would think 7 months would be plenty time to prepare yourself not only mentally, but also physically and spiritually. But the truth is, no amount of preparation can make you feel "ready" for this kind of procedure. Unless you've gone through it before, you really have no idea what to expect. And even if you have, I doubt the second time is the same as the first. We figure, it is best to just take this thing on a day to day basis. It can get a little overwhelming if you look at the process as a whole. So, baby steps here. Let's hope this thing goes by as fast as treatment has (its already been almost 7 months!!!).

In other news...
This has probably been one of the longest weeks of my life. Let's see:

Thursday (July 8) - Newspaper interview

Friday (July 9) - Front page news, damage control, last day of chemotherapy before transplant, PEREZ HILTON shout-out. HUGE influx of facebook group members!

Saturday (July 10) - Global Shift article

Sunday (July 11) - Unproductive M.A.M. Meeting

Monday (July 12) - Drama/Crisis/BIGTIMEDamageControl. My very first meltdown :) (total gongshow, by the way)

Tuesday (July 13) - Productive M.A.M. Meeting

Wednesday (July 14) - Bone Marrow Biopsy Results (74% down to 16%!!!!)

Thursday (July 15) - A **LOT** of M.A.M. Work

Friday (July 16) - Monsters Against Myeloma is LIVE!

Saturday/Sunday (July 17/18) - Rest

Monday (Today) - Begin Autologous Stem Cell Transplant process.

Shiz. We've definitely been busy. Overall, I think my stress level has probably gone up a couple notches. From the fundraiser to some family issues to the stress of the transplant, it is a miracle I have not been admitted into an institute yet. To tell you the truth, I am absolutely terrified of this transplant coming up. Not so much the procedure itself (although that is undoubtedly a bit daunting), but more so wondering how my mom will take it... All I want to do is protect her, but in these situations, it is QUITE a frequent occurrence to feel powerless... But not hopeless. Because there is ALWAYS hope. Sometimes it feels like a David and Goliath battle. But we all know what the outcome of that situation was right? ;) So, like every other day, I put on my brave face and do everything all over again. Its not easy, but you'd be surprised in the places you are able to draw strength from. We're starting a new chapter now, so wish us luck :) And for my prayer warriors out there, please pray that this thing goes without a hitch. That my mom has a super speedy recovery. And that it will be the last thing needed to set her into a long and lasting remission. Thank you :)

Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

This Shit is INSANE!!!

HOLY GUACAMOLE!!!!

OK. I just thought I would update everyone on what we've been up to and how the "Monsters Against Myeloma" event has been going :)

The last 24 hours have been BANANAS! Where do I even begin?!

Perhaps the beginning is a good start (obvi).

(I'm running on about 4 hours of sleep here, accompanied by +30C weather. So if I seem a little crazy, it's because I am)

1. Yesterday I did a great interview with the Edmonton Sun, answering questions about the MAM event and basically what we've been up to since the beginning of the year (diagnosis). It was quick, simple, and that was that! I was expecting the article to be a tiny little blurb in some obscure location within the newspaper, but DANG was I wrong. This morning I woke up to a text message saying, "You're on the front page! Congratulations!" My mom would later tell me that she had opened up a fortune cookie the night before foreshadowing a "surprise". Coincidence? (Link to our article HERE)

2. This bit might seem a little confusing, so i'll try to lay it out the best I can. Basically, we have kept my mom's situation on the downlow within my family solely for the reason that my grandparents don't find out. The very last thing we need is for another family member to get sick from stress. Not cool. So because of that, we had only told a couple families within our extended family. I'm not entirely sure WHAT I WAS THINKING when I was doing the interview and sent in the picture for the news article, but it definitely was not one of my brightest moments. So when I read the above mentioned text, I literally sat up straight in my bed and almost screamed. Yeah yeah, drama queen, I know. But I soon found out that the Sun had posted a HUGEEEEE picture of Gaga with a picture of my mom and I on the bottom. Yeah, that's not gonna get any attention AT ALL! You see, there are still people in my family that live in Edmonton who don't know about my mom's situation. I think I was somehow trying to get publicity for the event but at the same time foolishly pretend that my family would never get word of it? Silly SILLY Lance, Tricks are for... (you can complete this sentence). So for about a gooood...5 hours, I was a nervous wreck. I don't think I have been that stressed out since my mom was diagnosed. Yeah, brutes. I even lost my appetite (if you will remember, this also happened to me when mama bear was diagnosed). MY APPETITE! This is coming from a guy that feverishly watched 5 hours straight of Cake Boss...WHILST.EATING.CAKE! (and lots of it) Anyways, long story short, we haven't heard from any family members (yet), so we're hoping they didn't hear the news. My mom freaked out a little this morning, but now she thinks it might turn out to be a blessing in disguise. So... I'll roll with it. As long as she is cool, i'm cool. (PS: Is it weird that I am really really proud that we were featured FRONT PAGE, but also super angry of my incredible stupidity here?)

3. Today was the LAST day that mama bear received chemo before we start this crazy, wacky journey that is the "Autologous Stem Cell Transplant". It almost seems surreal. This abnormal routine has become such a constant fixture in our lives that it almost seems unnatural that we have stopped chemo (hopefully FOREVER AND EVER). Wow, I NEVER thought i'd see the day where I admit stopping chemo seems unnatural. Who would have thought? NOT I!!! Needless to say... Today is a monumental day for us.

4. I found out later on that PEREZ HILTON gave us a shout-out on Twitter, asking all the little monsters to join our cause, personally tweeting GAGA as well! Incase you weren't aware, this guy has a HUGEEEEE following!!! More than 2 MILLION followers on twitter!!! So to get M.A.M. on that kind of platform was BATSHITCRAZY!!!! Within half an hour of his tweet, we had more than 100 members join our group from all over the world! How amazing is that?!?! Little monsters globally uniting for a good cause. It's a beautiful thing. (PS: THANK YOU to whoever let Mr. Hilton aware of our event!!!!!)

5. (This week) I'm JUST getting over the cold (I know, WHO gets sick in the middle of SUMMER?!). It was one of those ones where you start of with a sore throat, then a cough, then fatigue, then faucet nostrils. Thankfully, i'm over that pain in the arse, but I think I might have accidentally gave it to my brother (oops) :( Perfect timing, eh? Well, while we were in treatment today, my mom's white blood cell and neutrophil (which go hand-in-hand usually) count were slightly above the normal range. Upside is, her immune system is working great! Downside, that could have been a sign that her body was creating an immune response to fight off something. NOT.GOOD. We need to get that down a little, which means my brother will probably have to be quarantined for the duration of his cold.

So YEAH! That's pretty much what's been happenin'! Monsters Against Myeloma is kicking into high gear now, so i'll DEFINITELY be updating more on that soon!

Hope everyone is doing well :)

Health, Hope, & Happiness

L

Monsters Against Myeloma

CALL TO ACTION!

Anyone who knows me well knows that I am an AVID Lady Gaga fan. She is my mother monster and I, her little monster. She is just... incredible. A force to be reckoned with. So, naturally, when word got out that she was having TWO shows in my city, I lost my shit. GONG to the SHOW. I bought tickets, and that was that! However, shortly after we found out that my mom was planned to undergo an Autologous Stem Cell Transplant close to the date of the concert. This kind of procedure reduces your immune system to nil. To give you some perspective, it is shot down to lower than that of a newborn baby's. It takes about 6 months, on average, for a person to fully recover from a stem cell transplant. So, unfortunately, that meant that I had to give up my tickets for the show. Sold-out concerts and jam-packed venues do not bode well for those wanting to avoid germs... As much as I love my mother monster (Gaga), I love my mama bear the most. I love everything about Gaga. Her music, her fierce independence, her love of life and passionate drive. All this is reflected in her body of work, right down to the sequin placed strategically, and unconventionally, on somewhere like her nose. But as much as I love her, I know she will FOR SURE be touring again in the future. I will have more opportunities to see her do what she does best. So instead of giving away the tickets, I thought, why not create something good from something bad? Thus, the birth of "Monsters Against Myeloma", a contest where a pair of floor tickets to Lady Gaga's August 27 show will be donated to the person(s) who can raise the most money for the MMRF (Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation). Multiple myeloma is a cancer not typically of the young. But the tides are changing. I have seen and heard of people being diagnosed in their 40's (like my mom) and 30's, something that would have been unheard of twenty years ago. I figure, with this contest, not only can we raise money for a good cause, but also awareness. We can raise awareness in a demographic that is unfamiliar with this disease. Encourage and inspire others. When people come up to me, upon hearing about my mom, saddened with the news, I make sure they know not to be sad, but to be angry, to rally together and fight for a cure. Although it is saddening, it is also something we should be fiercely angry about. These rising rates of cancer are NOT acceptable, and we need to make sure the right people know that. Through this contest, I am literally trying to save my mom's life. But not only that, also the lives of all the moms and dads and grandparents, and sons and daughters out there so that they might be able to see their children get married, have kids, and live a life worth living. I have included a link at the bottom of this post to our Facebook group page. Please join, even if you do not want to compete in the contest. Please join to inspire and encourage others to join and spread the word. Who knows, maybe even Gaga herself will get word ;) And if you like, please donate to this great cause. Paws up little monsters, paws up.

Monsters Against Myeloma

PS: If you have any ideas in how to further promote this event, PLEASE share them!

And So It Begins...

Ok! Well that meeting was... Productive! It went really well, actually. We do not yet have the results back from her urine test, but our doc told us that our total protein (mix of good AND bad protein) is now in the NORMAL RANGE!!!! HALLELUJAH! You can imagine how elated we were when we heard that :) Being normal, that must mean that our m-spike protein levels went down a lot! So, as I mentioned before, we had no scheduled appointments after today. Well, we've decided to go for one more cycle of velcade/dex/rev to further reduce her proteins before we start prepping for transplant. June 15 is our consult date for stem cell transplant. Sooo, yeah. We're already at that point! I won't lie, I left the clinic with a mix of nervousness and anxiety (as did my mom). But, I think these feelings are normal and expected. This is a major milestone and treatment for us. I think we'll just need a couple days for everything to sink in. Good thing is, this is absolutely a step in the right direction, a step towards better health. It is completely necessary. We all know that. So, I guess we will have to start preparing for what is to come! Today was a good day and I am glad we are taking action and getting things initiated. *deep breath* This is another big step in our path to recovery. Wish us luck! All tips/recommendations/suggestions are greatly welcomed and appreciated.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

Wellness Wednesdays

People are getting sick. If you look at the statistics out there, you can easily see that cancer, heart disease, etc. are on the rise, and fast. I was reading a pamphlet not too long ago while we were in treatment, and it said that in Alberta alone, about 1 in every 2 (!!!) people will be diagnosed with cancer. I’m sorry, come again? 1 IN 2!!! Now, I consider Alberta to be a fairly healthy province, so can you imagine what the numbers would be for a less developed area? The times are changing. My generation is considered to be the first generation EVER to be outlived by our parents. Pathetic? Yes. Surprising? Absolutely not. The mark of my generation is symbolized by instant-food, automobile lunches, and microwave dinners. The fact that some kids cant even discern between a potato and a tomato (God bless Jamie Oliver) is just SAD and completely unacceptable. When my mother was diagnosed with cancer, I could not help but think "what could possibly cause your body to betray itself like this???" On an individual basis, it's a hard question to answer. But on a general basis, I truly think that it is due to a lack of respect for our bodies. Look at the things that we are putting into them! Chemicals upon chemicals upon chemicals! And not only that, but less and less of natural, clean, whole food. We have forgotten how to respect our bodies, and as a result, our bodies have responded. Simply put, something needs to change. We need to change. Change the way we eat, change what we eat, change where we eat, and so on. That’s why I’ve been inspired to start Wellness Wednesdays in order to nudge us all in a direction of a happier, healthier lifestyle.

So. Without further adieu...

Wellness Tip #1

“SHOP THE PERIPHERIES OF THE SUPERMARKET AND STAY OUT OF THE MIDDLE: Most supermarkets are laid out the same way: processed food products dominate the center aisles of the store while the cases of ostensibly fresh food – dairy, produce, meat, and fish – line the walls. If you keep to the edges of the store you’ll be that much more likely to wind up with real food in your shopping cart."

Source: In Defense of Food: An Eater’s Manifesto by Michael Pollan

We're Making Progress!

For those of you who don't actively follow the ACOR Myeloma Listserv, a member just recently posted an article in regards to the progress that treatment has made over the last ten years.

The article states that, about ten years ago, the median survival of myeloma patients was about three years. THREE!!! Scary stuff... However, with the sheer speed that research and treatment have made, that number has increased to about ten years. That's more than a 300% increase! This just goes to show that one can never place too much importance on a prognosis (I think they're ridiculous) because of how fast medicine is evolving! It's a great number, but still not good enough. We have to work together in fighting this beast off once and for all! The article also highlights the importance of clinical research, stating that this improvement in patient survival would not have been possible without them.

Here's the link if you want to read further!

Revelations & Tribulations

It's a little late right now, but I can't sleep (oh who am I kidding, I can sleep like it's nobody's business). There's just stuff on my mind that I need to let out.

It's been a little while since I posted anything in regards to treatment or myeloma-related. Life has been pretty consistent lately, nothing exciting. But I guess boring is good for now, right? Last week was the end of cycle 2, which felt like it went by in no time! February, in general, seems to have flown by! Good news is, the Velcade/Dex regimen seems to be doing its job and will hopefully continue to do so! M-spike levels are down by about 30% since diagnosis, which is pretty great considering we've only just finished our second cycle! As far as side-effects go, we've been blessed. And I'm thankful for every little blessing each day has given us. Aside from the obvious, my mom (and our family in general) hasn't been this healthy in a LONG.ASS time! She no longer needs to take iron supplements and her blood pressure is sitting at a very optimal level (around diagnosis, it was as high as 180/110!!! Now it hovers anywhere between 95/55 to 125/75). Things are, undoubtedly, a lot better. Ironically, cancer has forced us all to change for the better. We are stronger physically, mentally, and spiritually. Body, Mind, and Soul.

The other day, I told some of my close friends about the little situation that my family and I are in. A minor setback. I had told others, who are just as close to me, awhile back and it bothered me that I had waited so long to share the news... Which then triggered contemplation-mode. I had once wondered why my mom chose not to share the information with more people. I thought to myself, "if it were up to me, I would have tried to surround myself with my friends and family because I need their support through this". I know that she didn't (and still doesn't) want to tell many people because of all the commotion and stress it can cause on others (especially the grandparents), stuff like that. But it dawned on me the other day that the main thing that was pulling me back from telling my friends earlier was just simply because... It hurts. I'm not less-closer with these friends than the ones who already knew and am, by no means, in denial (I am trying to be as proactive as possible).But I realized that, for me, it all came down to the simple fact that it hurts every time I have to tell the same story. No matter how many times you tell someone that you or your family member has cancer, it doesn't really get easier. Every time I have to acknowledge that fact, it stings and it leaves a feeling of emptiness inside that brings you back to that "oh yeah" moment where you remember how serious the circumstances really are. It's like opening up scar tissue that has just finished healing. It's a wound that will never fully heal.

Despite that little revelation, I'm glad that I did it anyways. I'm not sure if this is how my mom feels, and I don't know if it will ever get any easier. In fact, this whole path that we've been shoved onto has been full of ifs, buts, and i-don't-knows. But what I DO know is that we've made it this far and are stronger than ever. I used to be a fairly pessimistic person, preferring to be safely negative than run the risk of being optimistic and disappointed. Complaining was something that I rather enjoyed, embarrassingly enough. But I've come to realize through all of this that there is always a good in every situation. How does that saying go again? You will always be able to see the light of a candle, even in a world full of darkness? My thoughts exactly. I'm taking baby steps here on what will undoubtedly be a long and arduous road. Will I ever be happy when I am complaining? I think not. And I want to be happy my friends, I want to be happy.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

Just Breathe

Sitting in a local cafe on a beautiful Monday afternoon. A moment to myself, a time where I can just reflect on everything that's happened within the last month and a half. It's taken me a couple days to collect my thoughts together and really think, so this post spans a couple days. Careful kids, this ones a doozy!

It’s a beautiful morning today. The skies are blue, the air is crisp, and the sun is shining. I’m sitting in a coffee shop and find myself finally having a moment to reflect on everything that’s happened in the past month and some. Mom and Dad are probably sleeping away back home, resting and recharging their bodies for a new day. The last couple of days have been a little rough, to say the least. Since our last treatment on Friday, mom has been in quite a lot of pain. I’m not sure if it’s a sign that the chemo is working, or if it’s something else… but calling it fatigue would be putting it mildly as she needed assistance getting out of bed, walking, and getting out of her seat. She is such a strong woman, and it breaks my heart to see someone I love so much in so much pain. If there is a hell, then it is not one of flames and darkness. Hell is seeing someone you love in pain, seeing them suffer and not being able to do anything about it. That,my friends, is hell. It’s crazy how much of a rollercoaster cancer can be. I have never known anything so… terrifying, yet eye-opening, in my entire life. Everyday, I hurt. Some days are easier than others, but the fear and the pain are always there, like a snake that loosens and tightens its cold, suffocating grip around your heart. But at the same time, I feel a new sense of clarity and strength that I did not have before. It’s like I’ve been awakened by something powerful, profound, and meaningful. Almost like coming out of a fog with a newfound sense of purpose and direction. The highs are great and full of a weightlessness that makes you feel as if you’re normal again. With everything that has happened, you are able to truly appreciate and cherish moments like these because you know that a moment without pain and suffering is a moment to be thankful for. But the lows, they are equally as powerful, if not more. They are terrifying, devastating, and heartbreaking all in one. Since we first found out, I’ve discovered so much about my family and myself. I’ve discovered the power of optimism and hope. I’ve discovered how much it takes to draw strength from the deepest depths from within. I’ve discovered how powerful and important love and family are. When one first connects the word “cancer” to oneself, whether it be directly or indirectly through someone you love, your world falls apart. The ground beneath gives away, the sky comes crashing down, and you fall to your knees in such despair that you don’t know what to do, where to go, or even remember something as simple as how to breathe. Breathing is something that is regulated unconsciously and consciously through our body, something that is hardwired into ourselves to ensure survival. The impact of cancer was so devastating that, for about two weeks, I became a temporary asthmatic. I literally could not remember how to breathe properly. Constantly, I would find myself having to take deep breaths, not being able to draw enough oxygen into my system. Every time I drew a deep breath, I would get a feeling where my lungs would not be able to fill up completely. As if they were only able to draw in 80% of what they needed. I truly believed that I had developed a condition, but it was all in my head. The news had been so traumatic that I had become incapable of performing a task so simple and basic as breathing, to the point where I felt I had bruised my lungs from drawing so many consecutive deep breaths. Cancer was suffocating me. Breathing, something we do to draw energy from the world and live our lives, was being affected psychologically by my own body. And I wasn’t even the one with cancer! That is how much of an impact the news had on me. It temporarily persuaded my own body to betray itself, like cancer. When you first hear that cancer has chosen you or your loved ones, life is put into perspective. It forces you to take a big step back and seriously re-assess everything that you thought was important to you in your life. The effect of putting one’s life on a timeline that doesn’t all of the sudden extend into infinity is quite the experience. When we are healthy, we believe that we’re going to live forever, like immortals walking in the land of the dying and the diseased, completely unaffected. Cancer and other life-threatening conditions are myths and fables relegated to another universe. A universe eons away from the one you call home. It shouldn’t take something like cancer for us to wake up and realize how beautiful life is, to cherish each and every moment, to love, to smile, to just breathe. Because the truth is, we all have expiration dates, regardless of whatever foolish conditions you think may make you exempt from this universal fact of life. Life wasn’t created to be stretched over a period of time where we would forget what it meant. It was created so we could pass on our lessons and love, and more importantly, to truly live. When we are forced to realize this, it really is something else. What’s important to remember when you are diagnosed is that cancer is NOT a death sentence. Often times, the situation you find yourself in is what you make of it. It will be a death sentence if you let it become one. Never give up fighting and always look for newfound sources of motivation and inspiration. Today, research, medicine, and treatments are moving at such a rapid pace that a prognosis carries a diminishing level of importance (in my opinion). A doctor gives you a 5-year prognosis and you make it 6 years. So he gives you another 5-year prognosis, and so on, so forth until you’ve made it 15 years past your original prognosis. Whether you have cancer or not, you can't give up. Giving up is not an option. There will always be hope, even in the darkest of times. Hold on to it, believe in it, and use it to drag you out of the fire. This experience has changed me more in one month than any other experience ever has in my entire life. I won’t lie, there are times where a wandering thought will make its way into my head of what life would be like without my mother. My mom. My momma bear. And each and every time, my eyes begin to water and my heart begins to break. When you are suddenly forced to face your mortality face-to-face, it’s a scary thing and life seems so much more unstable and fragile. But you have to learn to wave those things away and stay on a path that will encourage you and support you. There are still moments where I will pause in sheer disbelief that this has become our new reality. I am still somewhat in denial, and I probably will be for quite some time. It's hard a thing to accept, even more so when it is forced on you like it has been on us and every other person affected by cancer. Everything moves so fast and quickly that you have little time to absorb. You're pushed and pulled in so many directions you literally feel like a dog chasing its own tail. Confused and getting nowhere. The world of cancer is vast and full of many unknowns. Time is of the essence. But not so much that you can't afford to pause and collect yourself, because you do have time for that. And it makes a world of a difference. Today (Friday), I met many lovely myeloma “warriors” at a support meeting (the first my family and I have ever been to). I’ve come to realize that there truly are angels on this earth, and some of them come in the form of nurses, doctors, support group members, and many others. These people are true godsends. Their hearts are filled with so much good. It’s amazing and leaves me overwhelmed and speechless. For those finding themselves newly diagnosed, I am truly sorry. This is not something that I would wish even on my worst of enemies. But if there is anything that I can tell you from my own experiences, just remember to breathe. Learn from my mistakes and our victories. I have felt what you feel, and let me tell you, the first 4-6 weeks are undoubtedly the hardest. The waiting. The pacing. The worrying. The news is devastating and traumatic, I know. At the time, we felt the most tremendous feeling of helplessness one could ever imagine. And trust me, trying to get a diagnosis during the holidays ain’t no walk in the park. EVERYTHING IS CLOSED! But know that you can gain control over your situation. Research, research, research and immerse yourself with as much information as you possibly can. And don't let anything discourage you! Information about the drugs you’ve been prescribed (side-effects, warnings, etc.), information about your condition (symptoms, care, etc.), information about nutrition (what to eat and what not to eat), information about precautionary measures (I decided to educate myself on CPR just in case I might need it some day (hopefully not)), and so on. There’s no such thing as being too well-prepared. The very basics for myeloma, that have been working for us, have been LOTS of water (at least 3L/day to help out your kidneys), plenty of fresh (if possible, organic) vegetables and fruits (for fiber and nutrients), daily exercise (to get oxygen into your system), cutting out refined sugars and processed foods (cancer FEEDS on sugar), and plenty of laughs (to keep your spirits up! Which is half the battle). For patients, like my mom, never stop fighting. Find a reason to fight! For your kids, to live a dream, to just LIVE. You will get broken and bruised along the way, but know that there will always be someone to lean on. Surround yourself with other patients, with family members, with friends. Surround yourself with goodness. And if you still find yourself alone or unable to reach out, know that you will always have me. Although I am still very new at this, an open ear needs no experience and you can talk to me about anything. Or, you can do what I did, and make a blog of your own and talk with the universe. Cast out your negative energy into space and share your goodness with others. For those of you who are caregivers, like myself, there will be times where you will feel helpless and other times where you feel like ripping your hair out! It’s ok to feel that way. Don’t feel guilty for wanting to take a breather for yourself. Take a break and spend a day to concentrate on yourself. You cannot help those you love unless you, yourself, are at your best. And for everyone, always remember to just breathe and believe. As I have mentioned, I am still very new at this. My advice may warrant a question or two from some of you, but what I lack in experience, I make up for in my sincerity and drive to overcome this beast with my family and all those fighting the good fight. I will share with you everything that I know so that we can all work together in finding the cure. If we work as a collective nation, we can and we will beat this thing once and for all.

Update!

Sitting through treatment with momma bear right now. I'm so so thankful that these things are less than an hour! We could do it in less time, but she prefers to take her kytril through an iv and have a full saline flush, which takes about an extra half hour. But she's comfortable with that and it gives her some time to rest, so whatever works right? Since the last time we were here, the numbers that we want up are up and hopefully those we want down have gone down (I looked through her files (which apparently I am not allowed to do due to legal reasons) and was able to look at a couple of the test results hehe. Sneaky me!). Since her first treatment, she has noticed that the pressure in her back has been reduced quite significantly, so HOPEFULLY HOPEFULLY HOPEFULLY that means that treatment is working and the myeloma cells are being reduced (thus, less pressure inside the bones). The sun is shining and she's feeling pretty good today, so ill take that as a sign that today will be a good day :). There is a fundraising race/marathon for MM in the summer that I'd really like to enter. Preferably the 5k. However, yesterday I discovered just how physically NOT.IN.SHAPE I am thanks to mr.treadmill. At 2.5k I was OVER IT! Sooo looks like ill need to do a little bit of training until then. But I'm excited! Ill consider it a goal to work towards. Anyone care to join me? :)
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